Thursday, November 15, 2007

full circle

I am sitting on a cloud. 9 years ago I graduated with a degree in architecture from a very prestigious school. I was broke, insecure, in love, lost, very confused and with every desire to spread my wings. I had started eating chicken (after 8 years of vegetarianism) as a sacrifice to God so in return my thesis project could get a passing grade, my partner in the project gave up smoking. She went back to smoking after we barely passed, I am still eating chicken. A few months after graduating I moved to LA with every desire to live in independence, travel the world and conquer it if possible. The dreams lasted for about three weeks because the pain of fear was so extreme, I moved to DC to be with my mom. I visited my boyfriend on the way there and a few months later he moved in with my mom and I. I now see how it all started wrong. Our dreams did not unite us but our fears.

I had many jobs that felt tedious. I was always to afraid to envision what I wanted and focused more on just making a living, in the process of course I felt as a complete under achiever and frustrated.

Now at 32 I am living what seems to be a complete circle. I writing this from my new office cubicle, my first job that has no attachment or consideration of my income, yet it is the highest paying job I have ever had. I chose it because it felt perfect; I am enamored with the company vision, with my quiet colleagues that type away all day and our collective dream of creating a more environmental friendly world. I love that reading green construction books and magazines are part of my job and that I am surrounded by people who dare to dream of a more greener possibility for all. Here, every single one of my past employment experiences and my education is valuable and appreciated; I even get to feel like an architect once again.

I accept my past mistakes and really only wish to have lived my life with more freedom. Part of the process of growing is having patience and knowing inside your heart that your wishes and dreams can come true regardless. They may come a bit different than you expected but at the perfect time when you truly can embrace them.

Sunday, November 4, 2007

thank you....

It has been a quiet time in my life. A lot of time at home with my family and with Simone. I was getting bored and then I got a few projects coming about: I had begun a jewelry company some 4 years ago and whenever I was short on money I go back to my beads and sell some. Now I am relaunching it, partnering up with my sister-in-law Pilar....the big date in Friday and it has been renamed UCHUVA. So I have also been immersed in beads and knitting and creating and organizing what I already had. I'm detached from the outcome, enjoying the process, wanting things to sell because I think they are pretty but not expecting anything financial. We are yet to create an impacting mission of our accessories, that is all we need to change the world.

Last week I also got the job of my dreams. I was a little weary because my resume is crazy jumping from career to career and not much stability. Then comes along a company that is perfect for my potpourri experience, my degree in architecture and my wish to pursue a career in the environmental field. PERFECT in every sense of the word...when I got the call for the interview and went on the company site, I just cried. I felt home, I felt that God had brought me home.

I have only to pay attention to ONE THING: my body. I have been eating badly, not exercising enough. Some clothes aren't fitting and I have to pay attention and complete this perfect moment I am experiencing.

I am really happy, I am really thankful, I look forward to everyday. I see my life coming together beautifully. I am experiencing beauty!