best of 2009 blog challenge: restaurant moment + article

my best restaurant moment of 2009...It was hard to think of a specific one. This year I have really learned the joy of home cooked meals and inviting people to our home. But there are 2 that feel special.Here I am at the restaurant, posing as Simone is asking me to...

The first one was in Rome, after only having breakfast and having lots of pizza Simone and I decided to have a nice meal on a beautiful Roman street and have some gelatto for dessert. I had amazing gnocchi with blue cheese sauce, Simone had pasta bolognese. Our bellies were full and our hearts content.

Simone is happy after our appetizer

My second yummy memory is of all the days we went to the beach and had mozzarella, tomato and arugula frisa for lunch. What was amazing was the freshness of all the ingredients and the arugula was fresh picked from the grassy areas around the beach.

This is Simone walking to lunch at one of those paradisaical beaches

Then for a larger "taste" of reality, the best article of 2009 is the Open Letter Michael Moore wrote to Obama, asking him not to send more troops to Afghanistan. He puts into words what so many of us have in our hearts.

best blog challenge: my best trip in 2009

Gwen Bell started the The Best of 2009 Challenge, writing about the best trip you took in 2009 was the first prompt.

So my best trip of course was visiting Spain and Italy with Simone. There is a lot of story behind this, I always thought that after college I would travel the world. Before that all my attempts to get to Europe had been canceled repeatedly, a couple times with tickets in hand. Somehow after college I found myself being in love, I found getting used to being back in the US challenging and two and half years later I was married and expecting a baby. 3 years later getting a divorce....too much going on to go anywhere.

This summer, after the trip we had initially planned went bust, I jumped at the chance of Europe and planned the whole thing in about 10 days. It was amazing and beautiful and fun. It was also a celebration trip for Simone and I, of all we had gone through and the wonderful relationship we share. It was perfect and cannot wait to get back, I am actually hoping that at some point we get to live there.

what is calling me

Today I am simply copying something wisely written by the lovely Kelly Rae Roberts, because I couldn't have said it better myself and my soul is screaming it inside me.

dear universe,

thank you for the important questions and for the honest answers. thank you for the encouragement to stay true to what calls me, no matter how inconvenient it might be for my timeline, spreadsheets, or checkbook. thank you for the unending inspiration. for creative flow. for heartful exchanges, for truth seeking, and for the everyday opportunities to learn more about what is really truly calling me. i'm listening. i'm questioning. and i'm answering. thank you.

runaway

I have gone through so many things in the last couple of months. In fact, it is hard to believe that 2 months ago I was walking the streets of a small Mediterranean town and enjoying our last day in southern Italy. One month ago I moved out of the house I had lived in for the past 4 years. My first home since I separated. One month ago in a whirlwind of blessings and determination we moved in together to an apartment closer to the city and above never ending clouds of green.

We are happy, all three of us. We are loving this change in our lives. So today, I am taking the day to clean my new home and listening to music. Then a song by Los Pericos started playing. This song Jimmy declared was our song on our second date. We were driving to the Nissan Pavilion to a concert on his beloved mustang convertible "Jim". I didn't really pay attention to the song then. I have listened to a few times after but never until today did it feel so perfect. Listening to it made me smile today. It is so simple, yet it is so much our story....



Cuídame bien, que lo mío es serio,
quiero que estés a mi lado esta vez
Voy a fumar mientras te espero,
Voy a formar, un espacio mejor.

Runa, runa, runa runaway, away
Runa, runa, runa runaway, away

Voy a escribir con nubes tu nombre,
voy a soñar con tu cara hoy,
voy a pedir que nunca te vayas
quiero escuchar, más palabras de amor.
Runa, runa, runa runaway, away
Runa, runa, runa runaway, away

Cuídame bien, que siempre me pierdo
Quiero que estés, a mi lado esta vez
Voy a tomar tu mano en mi mano,
para formar un espacio mejor.

Runa, runa, runa runaway, away
Runa, runa, runa runaway, away

away, away away
away, away away

Cuídame, cuidame bien, que lo mío es serio.

stories from spain

I had meant to write a few days back but by the time we are getting home each day, I am exhausted. We have been in Spain for 8 days, all of which have amazing. Each day a whole new breathtaking adventure. We were in Madrid for 6 days and fell in love with the city so much that Simone and I declared that we would happily move there. We have been in Barcelona for 2, and although I had always dreamt of coming here and it's by all means a lovely city, we have not fallen in love....and to top it off, some hours ago on our way home, some one got into my purse and helped themselves to my camera and my cell. I had ALL the pictures from the trip there, all now lost...

So I am sad because we had some great times recorded there. Yesterday on our walk down Las Ramblas my Simo spent all her change to have pictures taken with all the performers on the street...Simone and I decided we were going to write it all down so we would remember and of course at least we have eachother to share the memories with....and my wallet was not taken, nor our passports stolen and we are ok, but it still feels so wrong when something like that happens. I just have to feel better tomorrow morning so we can continue with our trip, we still have a bit more than 2 weeks to go! oh, and I have to decide whether to get a new camera here or just continue to have all our memories in our hearts, just for us two to share.

making history

The responses of love and support  were overwhelming. Thank so much! As a mom all I can say is that having my daughter back home is like being able to breath deeply again. For a long time I felt that the only times I could trully relax were the times I knew Simone was with her dad, now I feel that I can only relax when I know she is at least within a 15 mile radius, if not standing right by my side.

She is actually not by my side at this time...the down side of an independant girl is that she has a strong social circle and is now at her best friend's for a sleep over.

In the past week I have been thinking a lot about our role as mothers of girls. In my life I have been overly condesending and submissive, a strong voice of authority and I feel like a 5 year old being yelled at. I have to struggle within me constantly to stand up for myself and let my voice be heard. This has been the root of many set backs in my life. I never want that for my daughter. I believe that we can't expect to raise submissive daughters at home and expect them to go out as adults and seize the world. We can't expect to have daughters who never attempt to bend rules or question them and then as adults make a change in the world. What they live as kids and the life skills they start learning as kids are the tools that will make them who they are, rule makers or rule takers.

As parents we are always walking the very thin line of freedom of expression for our kids and respect for authority. How to do this is a growing challenge as she gets older. How do I teach her that there are times when she gets a say in the situation and there are times "when Mother knows best" and all this while attempting to raise her well... 

So I have decided I want to raise a strong girl, a girl who will not be afraid to make herself be heard and a make a difference in some shape or form. A girl who knows what she wants and will be willing to do the work to get it. Her heart will of course have to be full of love, compassion, faith and God to guide her in the right direction, to set her goals in the right place... but I don't want raise "a good little girl"....because you know, good girls have never made history.

simone's happy heart

Simone and I are a team. We are inseparable partners in life and I enjoy every minute. I feel privileged to be so close to this little person with such an enormous soul. She is now in Miami visiting her daddy and she was supposed to come back home tomorrow. I was excited because I get the daily school routine and now I was ready to do some summer fun but yesterday I got a call from her dad asking for an extra week....

Of course I said yes! I heard her little voice of excitement telling me about the fun she is having and how she has so many adventures planned with daddy...so with a broken heart, I said yes. I wanted to cry because I have missed her so much these past ten days. I make the most of my time away from her and try to relax....but the mommy heart and mind is always on. I can only be thankful that she has such a marvelous dad, he has done his best to be a part of her life in the distance. He has done his best to make her feel loved and special in his life...and she is having a blast. I have been determined as a mother to share her with the world, I have raised her an independent little girl since she was a baby. Her dad and I always made sure she was strong and secure....we just didn't know we were preparing her for life. A life of numerous flights on her own, months without seeing daddy, weeks without mommy...holidays back and forth...things that could break a little soul. But my little girl is wise beyond her years, stronger than so many souls I have encountered in my lifetime. She is a beauty in every sense of the word but every time I let her go a little part of my heart chips away.

I was so ready to have her back... but how could I ever say no to my angel's happy heart...